Sleeping Venus
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mjacobson's picture


You'd think as the goddess of Love, Venus could catch a break in bed.

Don’t you hate it when you’re trying to take a nap but your macho husband decides now is the time to finally get around to the house repairs, and then because no one is watching your annoying baby, he stabs you with his crossbow?  I mean, that floorboard has been squeaky for months and Vulcan was always too busy to deal with it, until after an entire night of taking care of the baby, you ask him to watch Cupid so you can have some much-needed beauty sleep.  You’re Venus, you have a reputation to maintain! But no, now all of a sudden Vulcan can’t watch the baby because the floorboard has suddenly become super important.  You let the baby play with his toys (in hindsight, a crossbow is maybe not the best toy for a baby) while you rest for a couple of minutes...but there's no rest for the naked. 

Despite the frustrating scenario we see before us, this is not a portrayal of the hardships of motherhood.  This painting was probably supposed to show how sexy Venus is.  The light focuses entirely on her nude body, excluding her face, and she is positioned to face towards the viewer.  Maybe she’s tired of her husband Vulcan constantly hammering shit, but nothing screams “unavailable” like a baby with a weapon.

In Roman mythology, Venus is super wishy-washy and benign.  She doesn’t really care about much and she never gets mad.  She’s chill to the point where she actually absorbs male anger, thereby getting the guys to chill, too.  So it makes sense that after dealing with all that testosterone, this goddess needs some R&R.